Liliana had her 4th birthday on Tuesday, September 27. Can you believe how fast time went by? She’s 4… it’s been 4 years since my entire life was upended. Yes I’m being serious about this. She changed my life, and while at the time I had no idea how I was going to get through it, it was for the better.
I scheduled her an appointment, and was amazed at how fast she managed to get one. So we went today to get her checked out. We ended the appointment with a referral for her tumor. Thankfully! Her previous pediatrician wouldn’t give us a referral unless I got her records from her old hospital, yet with a 6 hour time difference it seemed impossible to do so.
Nevertheless, her appointment went fine. Her doctor complimented how smart Lily is and how healthy everything looks. I’m glad to hear it! Now we have a Dental appointment to make.
I got a call today about Aidan misbehaving on the bus. I was stunned silent for a moment. I was SO worried when she called and introduced herself as the Assistant Principal. My mind didn’t go to discipline. It went to them saying something wrong or doing something wrong but not misbehaving. Aidan got written up on the bus on Friday. He was using his backpack like a weapon and trying to hit the students on the bus in front of him. I got so angry.
While cleaning the living room I discovered a mostly empty bottle of vitamin C gummies hidden behind the television. I automatically assumed one of my boys did it. However it explains why Lili didn’t eat yesterday. She was having an upset tummy over her indulgence in Vitamin C. Which I’ve looked it up and most reports are about it being water soluble. Stating that it mostly comes out in the urine, but it can cause upset stomach and diarrhea. So it was her. The boys were fine and ate their meals yesterday. I even tried some trick question tactics, but Lili answered them all correctly. So it was her.
I feel like a good strong mom today. Most days I struggle with this, but not today. This referral situation has me hoping this is a one time thing, and isn’t a glimpse into the future. I hope this is the only one.
I knew that not all friendships are built to last. You gain some, you lose some. However I’ve lost a lot of friends this year. Each for various reasons. Knowing that not all friendships last doesn’t make this any easier for me. Losing friends hurts, no matter the reason. You were once friends, now you’re not. I’ve lost friends for reasons like drinking alcohol (which for the record it was a Midnight Halloween Party after the kids had gone to bed) and while I understand why some people would walk away, I didn’t understand this particular instance. I think he just wanted an excuse to cut the friendship. We lived in different states, and rarely spoke at all. Yet the fact that I was drinking alcohol at a party, 4 states away, told him that I was a bad friend and wasn’t good for him. I understand that, but I wasn’t pressuring or influencing. Could it be that I was creating the temptation for him to drink? Did he have a deeper problem with alcohol than I knew? There was also an issue where everything I’d ever stressed about was being called drama. I also got called materialistic for talking about my iPad on Facebook. To be honest, I’m the furthest thing from materialistic that anyone knows. I could care less about what I own, because my family and friendships are all I need. In-fact, I haven’t really touched that iPad in years, and it was a gift.
Another friendship failed simply because of a girl. He wanted to make some big gesture by ending my friendship to please someone else… this someone else didn’t even care that we were friends! Another excuse to rid me from his life perhaps? I assume as much because while we did speak, he didn’t say a single word to me until after I’d had the chance to rebuild a lost friendship with the woman he cut ours for. He THEN spoke to me and apologized but I don’t want to be friends with someone who cut me out over someone else. That’s too much for me, and whose to say it won’t happen again in the future? I found out he was a liar anyway.
Yet another friendship was cut for unknown reasons. Probably because he was a mutual friend of the guy in the paragraph above. Another friendship was lost because her husband lied about mine, causing mine to get in trouble. Another friendship was lost because of unknown reasons. It really just goes to show that not ALL friendships are built to last. I have maybe 4 total friends that I know will ALWAYS be there for me. I have friendships I hope last, but probably won’t. No I won’t treat them like they won’t last, but I will definitely work on them regardless. I hate losing friends, and I love meeting people. So this year has been a social anxiety turning point for me. I don’t know whether I should keep trying to just become a recluse. So I’m working on the latter of the two.
I’ve been focusing on my YouTube channel, however I also have two other youtube channels that need to be uploaded on. I’m working on my style and my setup for both of my extra channels.
What I mean is I have a personal channel, and a gaming channel. Both of which are a spin off from my main channel, which is my family channel. Yes I’m a mother, and I also have hobbies. I don’t believe that women should be confined strictly to housework and such so I want to show every part of me. I’m not a very private person, but there are things that I do keep to myself. This blog for example I started for two reasons. One is I hate filling up a journal and having to buy a new one. Two I have mismanaged a journal to the point where it ultimately hurt me more than any good it did for me. I don’t want to hide things, and if I need to then there’s a place for it.
For my gaming channel I need to buy a webcam and a microphone, or ultimately just a webcam that I can use for my gaming channel.
I’ve been wanting to start doing daily vlogs for a while, and I finally managed to get going on it. It was unplanned because I ended up using the new logo by mistake (in other words, I forgot it said “Daily Vlogs”) but I embraced it. I need to make time to get into the groove of it before I try adjusting my routine. This is a new adventure but I’m thrilled about it.
I have ordered a new tripod on Amazon, and I can’t wait for it to come in. It looks like the right one, so when it arrives I’ll know for sure if it is or not. I’m curious to know how fellow youtubers got their wind muffs for their canon. Did they make them, or buy them? I’m unsure.